How To Tell If Cats Are Bonded

One kitten licking another kitten

Cats get a bad rap for being anti-social. (And often their owners get accused of being anti-social as well.) But, contrary to popular belief, cats are very social creatures, and because of this, bonding is quite common for them.

Cats are social creatures that have the natural ability to bond with one another. When cats bond, they will often exhibit displays of affection that are uncommon between two unbonded cats, such as sleeping together, playing together, and grooming one another.

Just like human siblings, kittens of the same litter are highly likely to bond with each other, and bonded cats become dependent on each other for emotional and physical wellbeing.

So, if you curious to know if your cats are bonded with one another — and what exactly that means — then we’ve got you covered.

 

 

What Is Bonding In Cats?

Despite their reputation, cats are social creatures, and they have natural instincts to form packs. When two cats form a friendship and start to spend more time together than they spend alone or with other cats, they’ve probably bonded with each other.

Bonded cats tend to become dependent on each other for emotional support and physical wellbeing. Suppose you don’t already own a cat, and you’re considering adoption. In that case, you may have a lot of luck with adjusting them to their new home if they are already a bonded pair.

But, if you do own two or more cats, there’s no guarantee that they will bond. There is a higher chance of having two of your pets bond, but this isn’t always the case.

There are a few ways to tell if your furry friend is bonded with another cat. As you might expect, bonded cats spend most of their time together. You’ll probably find them together cuddling, grooming each other, sleeping curled up together, and playing together.

If you think you may have a bonded pair, there are usually a few tell-tale signs that can help to confirm their friendship.

How Can I Tell If My Cats Are A Bonded Pair?

There are several different ways to tell when cats have bonded:

  • Bonded cats will spend most of their time together, whether it’s sleeping, cuddling, or even playing together.
  • A cat is most vulnerable when it is sleeping. So, if two cats are sleeping together, it means that they trust each other enough to relax together, and they are comfortable in each other’s presence.
  • Bonded cats tend to rub their faces together. This adorable interaction happens when your cats are exchanging scents. Cats actually have scent glands all over their bodies that release pheromones, and the scent glands around their faces are low-intensity and usually considered friendly. So if you notice that your cats rub their faces together, it’s a great sign! It means that they are comforting each other by showing that they are friendly.
  • If your kitties are sitting together with their tails intertwined (which I have never seen any of my cats do), they are probably exchanging pheromones. It may also mean that they’re comfortable being close to one another and are sharing affection.
  • If your cats are grooming each other, this is more than likely a clear-cut sign that they’ve bonded with each other and are showing their best buddy just how much they love them. (Interestingly, regardless of whether their bonded partner is male or female, male cats are far more likely to begin grooming their buddy than females are.)
  • It’s nothing new to hear your cats meow at you at all hours of the day. This adorable sound is how our cats communicate with us and tell us important bits of information – from trying to get out attention to telling us that they’re hungry (again). But cats hardly ever meow at one another — instead they have other ways of Kitty Communicating.) But when a bonded pair of cats is apart, however, or even if one of them is missing or in trouble, you may hear your cat begin to meow as a way to call out for their bonded buddy.
  • Lastly, playtime is another great indicator of whether cats are bonded or not. When cats are playing, they usually have their stomachs exposed and will often get into positions that would otherwise make them very vulnerable. If cats play together, chase one another, or even have a mini-furball-sized wrestling match, it probably means that they are comfortable together and that they have complete trust in one another.

 

How Long Does it Take Until Cats Are Bonded?

three cats looking out the window together

While we’d all love to have a bonded pair of cats, bonding isn’t always guaranteed.

With that being said, when cats do bond, it can take a while. And that makes sense if you think about it – after all, you aren’t best friends with someone overnight. Cat bonding can take anywhere from a few days to even a couple of months.

Kittens are very likely to be bonded with those from the same litter right from the start. This is because they have the same scent while being taken care of by their mother, and – just like siblings – they grow up together, which gives them plenty of time to bond.

If your kittens come from different litters, don’t worry. Kittens from different litters who are raised together can still bond very easily. That’s because kittens have very flexible personalities compared to older cats. (Kinda like humans.) When cats spend enough time together while they’re growing up, it is quite common for them to bond.

On the other hand — and not surprisingly — adult cats can take longer to bond. Sometimes cats don’t bond at all and simply live in the same house. (We’ve had some of those over the years.) But even when adult cats aren’t best buddies, they’re usually pretty good at minding their own business and keeping the peace among themselves.

A few years ago I fostered a sweet, adult lap cat named Bandit. Unfortunately, after a few weeks we had to give him to another foster family because one of our existing cats was such a mean old bully to him.

The foster organization told us that it we ever wanted to try fostering again (which we haven’t yet) to try getting a kitten. They said that cats who were antagonist toward adult cats would often tend to be welcoming and kind toward a kitten.

One of the biggest factors when it comes to whether or not a pair of cats will bond is how you first introduced them to one another.

Cats are naturally territorial. So, without a gradual introduction, they might see a new cat that is brought into their home as their enemy. A gradual introduction is the best way to get cats to be okay with each other and gives them a much better chance at bonding.

While it’s important to get your new cat used to its environment, at the same time, it’s just as important to get your older cat used to the fact that his new buddy is going to be sticking around.

Adult cats are normally more set in their ways, and it is harder to change their perceptions about a new cat entering their home. But, if you do it gradually, there’s a much better chance of your cats getting on in the future.

 

What Happens When You Separate A Bonded Pair Of Cats?

While separating a bonded pair of cats is never the best idea, it may be even more traumatic for them to be separated past a certain age. When bonded cats are separated, they are likely to show signs of depression and grief. You may even find your cat looking lost or searching for its companion around the house.

The loss of their companion will inspire worry and may unsettle your cat to the point of refusing food or water. While this will eventually pass, you should monitor your cat during this time. You’ll need to understand that, just like humans, their grieving process will take time.

Besides a few days of searching, younger cats and kittens are more likely to adjust to the loss of a littermate or friend without long-lasting effects on their behavior. This is why most people give away the kittens of a new litter as soon as they pass a few weeks old.

Although it’s almost always possible to help your cat adjust to the absence of its companion, it will probably require a lot of extra love and attention on your part. It’s also important to keep an eye on its behavior.

When bonded cats are separated, their behavior can undergo negative changes. A few of the behavior changes that have been most noted are:
● Excessive meowing
● Searching for their companion
● Increase in sleep, especially in spots that have their companion’s scent
● Appetite changes, either increased or decreased
● Grooming changes, either excessive self-grooming or a lack of grooming
● Attention-seeking behavior from owners
● Avoiding owners’ company and affection
● Aggression towards owners

If your cat is exhibiting any of these signs after being separated from its bonded mate, you should consult an animal behaviorist or veterinarian on how to ease the adjustment process for your furry friend.

 

Can Bonded Cats Become Unbonded?

Two white cats

Once cats are bonded, it is very unlikely for them to become unbonded.

While some may believe that it’s possible because a cat’s temperament might change as they age, cats are usually bonded for life. (Which I think is pretty sweet.) Even if bonded cats are separated and re-introduced, they are likely to go back to being best friends.

When bonded cats are separated, they can become depressed, lose their appetite, and their health can suffer. This is a sign that bonded cats don’t even lose their bond to their partner after they have been separated.

Although bonded cats may fight, they normally get over it pretty quickly. It could be because of some environmental change that they do not like or a neighborhood cat that has entered their territory and upset them.

Sometimes when bonded cats are re-introduced, they are slightly aggressive towards each other. This aggression is because of the way that the re-introduced cat smells. When two cats are bonded, they share the same scent because of their grooming and cuddling together. When one of the cats is removed (because, say, they need to go to the vet for a couple days), its scent may change.

Scents are extremely important to cats, so they are understandably quite upset when their companion’s scent changes. (“I feel like I don’t even know you anymore!”) This change in scent can lead to fights more often than not, but the aggression is usually short-lived.

 

Can A Kitten And A Mature Cat Bond?

Introducing a kitten into an older cat’s home may be and could potentially present a few challenges along the way. Cats are very protective of their habitat, and introducing a new cat is often difficult.

I mentioned earlier that sometimes a cat who’s aggressive to a new adult cat in the house will act kind and nurturing around a new kitten in the family.

However, sometimes bringing a kitten home to an adult cat can create unique problems.

While kittens are almost always eager to make friends, your older cat may not be as friendly. Because of their age and immaturity, kittens don’t pay attention to things like territory. This presents the problem of the older cat feeling threatened and can lead to aggression from the older cat.

Kittens also don’t pay attention to personal space and merely want to interact with other cats to play and seek comfort. But, as any cat owner knows, adult cats have enough trouble accepting a new cat in their territory, let alone a kitten with absolutely no regard for personal space.

If you have an older cat, the introduction of a new kitten should be gradual and should never be forced. Your cat should begin to accept the new kitten as a roommate and not as a potential threat through the gradual introduction.

Once your older cat accepts a new kitten into its space, you may notice a few signs of bonding in the future. Even if they don’t bond, most cats will accept that their new sibling is allowed in their home, and the cats will spend their lives coexisting peacefully and seeking affection from their humans instead.

 

Can Cats Bond To Dogs?

dog and cat together

If you have a pooch in the home, you may have noticed that your cat prefers to spend more time with them than any of their other feline companions. But does this mean that your cat and dog have bonded?

The simple answer is yes, but it may not always be an instant connection.

The first step to fostering a bond between your pets, like I mentioned earlier, is to make sure that they’re introduced properly. By introducing them slowly, they will be more likely to be accepting of one another from the start.

Of course, the bond between your pup and your cat can’t be forced, and it’s important to remember that sometimes the best that you can hope for is for your pets to tolerate one another.

But, over time, you may notice a friendship blooming between your pets.

The first sign that your pets have bonded are that they will more than likely enjoy playing with or around one another. And if you catch your pets sleeping in the same bed or if they are cuddled up with one another, you can be sure that you have a bonded cat and dog.

 

Can Cats Bond To Humans?

If you have a cat that hasn’t bonded to any of your other pets, you may be wondering if it’s possible for your cat to bond to you.

Many cat experts actually think that this bond is entirely possible.

That’s because cats build strong bonds and connections with their owners that form as a result of trust. You’ll know that your cat has bonded to you if it’s almost always looking for your attention – from greeting you with a straight tail, meowing at your, or even pawing at you to get your attention (and maybe a gentle pet or two).

Another way to tell if your cat has bonded to you is to take note of how close they want to be to you. If Fluffy has been following you around all day, chances are that they feel extremely safe with you.

If you’re still unsure of whether or not your cat has bonded to you, they also have a tendency to become overly affectionate with you. From purring in your presence to rubbing or butting their head against yours (yup, one of mine does this almost every morning), these signs are usually clear signals that your cat is trying to send you to let you know that they love and trust you.

 

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